Tim meets the right guy for the Dinner for Schmucks in the person of Barry (Steve Carell), an IRS worker. One look at him and you can come up with the conclusion that he’s socially inept. Barry also has this weird hobby of creating dioramas out of dead mice, which made Tim think that he has the perfect man to help him win the contest.

Dinner for Schmucks has the right premise to deliver a funny movie. But the result is bland and not funny at all. The extended runtime also didn’t help its cause. At 114 minutes, it’s just way too long with lots of boring parts. Yes, it could drag you down to hell.

Barry (Steve Carell): So dare to dream. Dream your wildest dreams. You can climb the highest mountain. You can drown in a teacup, if you find a big enough teacup. And if somebody tells you that you can’t do something, you say, ‘Yes, I can. ‘Cause I’m doing it right.

I didn’t find a single funny moment in Dinner for Schmucks. Maybe we were misled to think that it was a comedy. Maybe the director wanted the audience to feel how miserable Tim’s life became after he met Barry. Because that’s the only emotion I got after watching this movie. Better skip this one even if your life depends on it.

Beth (Kristen Bell) is a workaholic New Yorker who’s unlucky in love. She goes to Rome for her sister’s wedding, where she meets Nick (Josh Duhamel). But he’s not the only guy that falls for her and I don’t blame them. She would have the same effect on me.

But in When in Rome, the guys fall for her because of the coins that she took from the fountain. Conflict arises because she doesn’t know whether Nick truly loves her or if he’s just under her spell for getting his coin from the fountain.

The scriptwriters of When in Rome might have thought that they were making a movie for kids. The story is predictable, not funny, and tedious to watch. Plus, the scenarios are too absurd. What made it watchable are the performances of the cast members. Ok, I have to admit that I’m a Veronica Mars fanboy.

Gale (Dax Shepard): This is crazy. I don’t know whether to look at my own reflection or to look at you. That’s how beautiful you are!

When in Rome is a perfect example why I don’t want to watch movies in this genre. It is pointless and a total waste of time. Forget about watching this movie because even if you do watch it, you’ll forget about it in the end. Oh, and did I mention that the unfunny Dax Shepard was in it? Skip When in Rome at all cost.

The Bounty Hunter’s story is straight forward with no twists and turns. It doesn’t take a genius to predict the ending. I thought I was in for a romantic comedy but there’s nothing romantic or comedic about the movie.

Nicole Hurley (Jennifer Aniston): No, you have got to be kidding! You cannot be putting me in the trunk! You cannot be seri-!
Milo Boyd (Gerard Butler): [shuts the trunk] I’m dead “seri”!

Trust me when I say that you got nothing to gain when you watch this movie. The story is unbelievable. The characters are shallow. Ending is predictable. If you love cheesy fluffs and predictable endings, then you might enjoy The Bounty Hunter.

It does have some funny moments and is not a total waste of time, especially if you’re a fan of either Jennifer Aniston or Gerard Butler. But it is definitely not a good one. The Bounty Hunter falls in the category of movies that you’ll forget once it’s over. I enjoy watching Dog the Bounty Hunter than this movie.

Speaking of the village, all men are off to some war. This is the reason why it is dominated by female who likes to wear revealing clothes. The director knows his target market and filled the village with hot Korean girls.

The main girl in Tale of Legendary Libido is Dal Gaeng, played by Kim Shin Ah. She’s now known as Kim Ye Won. She’s a sickly girl who became Byun’s wife. She fitted the role well and it’s a pity that she had to be the partner of a boring guy.

Despite all the eye candies of Tale of Legendary Libido, the movie is still boring. It was hyped to be a sex comedy but I didn’t find it funny. At least they got the sex part right. The movie dragged too long and became too predictable. I was not surprised to find out that Byun managed to escape the bear.

Tale of Legendary Libido is a sex comedy in a period setting. It tried to be funny with its slap-stick in the first part and then became serious in the final minutes. I endured it because of the girls featured in the movie but aside from them, I don’t have nice things to say about it.

Ok, back to the American Virgin. Priscilla goes to college via a scholarship from an organization that promotes celibacy. Then one day she got drunk at a party and got caught on film topless by Chicks Go Crazy, which is a parody of Girls Gone Wild. Rob Schneider plays Ed Curtzman, the main man of Chicks Go Crazy.

With her scholarship on the line, Priscilla and her new college friends embark on a journey, following Chicks Go Crazy around the country as she tries to retrieve the tape back. She learned a lot of lessons along the way that she would not get from college.

American Virgin feels like Road Trip for girls. It features typical college humor but I didn’t find it funny at all. To be honest, the breast exposures are the only reason I watched the movie to the end. Other than that, it has no entertainment value at all. And after going through all the trouble, she learns that it was not her topless in the video.

Naz (Brianne Davis): All I’m saying is, take your time. Think about what you really want. And if you wanna fuck every guy in the city, I’ll support you. Hell, I’ll even join you. But if you decide to be a virgin for the rest of your life, that is okay too. Make sure it your choice, not your parents’ choice. Not my choice, not Mary Margaret choice. Your choice.

One good thing about the movie is that American Virgin tries to convince girls not to expose themselves so that they could be featured in shows such as Girls Gone Wild and the likes. The bad news is that I don’t think girls would watch this movie at all.

If you want to see boobs then watch American Virgin. If you’re looking for a good comedy, avoid this one. It is boring and a total waste of time.

Dado is the typical Filipino migrant worker who chose to leave his wife and kid in the Philippines to earn more money overseas. He works in a factory and sends money back to his family back home. Even though he works hard for his family back home, the loneliness in a foreign land got to him and has a relationship with Anna (Meryll Soriano) who works as a domestic helper in Taiwan.

Manuel is Dado’s hopeless romantic co-worker. Unlike Dado, he doesn’t have any financial obligation back home. He uses their free day, which is Sunday, to chase after girls and his newest target is Celia (Alessandra de Rossi) the bargirl.

One Sunday Dado and Manuel found an abandoned red sofa and they decided to take it back to their dorm. Pinoy Sunday began as a peek into the life of Filipino workers in Taiwan but turned into a dumb buddy movie.

The red sofa represents the hardships that the two friends experienced in the foreign land. Pinoy Sunday showed that true friends will stay with you no matter what happens. I just didn’t like the way the story played out. There are some scenarios that are too absurd. I can’t believe that the two guys are that stupid.

Bayani Agbayani and Epy Quizon are good and their on-screen chemistry is credible. But don’t expect it to be a laugh out loud movie. It is best to watch Pinoy Sunday with a friend. At least the two of you can distract each other when the movie becomes tedious to watch.

Petrang Kabayo is about a boy (young Peter played by Makisig Morales) who’s maltreated by his father Poldo (John Arcilla) because he’s gay. One day he decided to run away and met Biday (Eugene Domingo), who adopted him as her own.

Peter grew up (now played by Vice Ganda) to be a meanie. He abuses the people and even the horses in Biday’s ranch. This made Diobayo (Eagle Riggs) put a curse on him. Every time he mistreats anyone, he will turn into a horse. The curse can only be broken when he is kissed on the lips by a man who loves him unconditionally. The unlucky guy who caught Peter’s eye is Erickson (Luis Manzano).

Now where do I start? Aside from the typical fairy tale as its plot, Petrang Kabayo suffered from technical errors. Post-editing of the movie felt like it was done by amateurs. It felt like I was watching a camera rip of the movie. People who paid to watch this movie is ripped off.

I don’t want to disrespect people who find Vice Ganda to be funny but I just don’t find rumor in his brand of comedy. His sarcastic one-liners are funny at first but to make a movie based on that alone can be tedious. Plus slapstick routines are stale.

One thing I learned from the movie is that horses also have feelings and I don’t want to hurt Vice Ganda’s by listing the other things I hated about Petrang Kabayo. Race day in Santa Ana Park or San Lazaro Leisure Park is more entertaining than this movie.

The Book of Love was not funny at all. The jokes were old and were recycled from the previous American Pie movies. I still find humor from juvenile jokes but this movie didn’t have any laugh out loud moment.

Aside from Eugene Levey as Mr. Levenstein, there were no other familiar characters in The Book of Love. There was a Stifler but he was nothing compared to the original one. You don’t expect an American Pie movie to win an acting award but the actors in this one were so bad that even if I’m wasted I won’t enjoy it.

You should avoid watching American Pie Presents: The Book of Love at all costs. This movie is just wrong in so many ways. Not even all the tits featured in it can change the way I feel about this movie. I really hope that I won’t see another American Pie movie. Well maybe a reunion movie of the original cast would be nice. NOT!

Hating Kapatid is about two sisters, Rica (Judy Ann Santos) and Cecil (Sarah Geronimo). Their parents had to go abroad to work and left them in the care of their grandmother Gerty (Gina Pareno). At a very young age, Rica took the responsibility to be both father and mother for Cecil. She even sacrificed her personal life and left her boyfriend Bong (JC de Vera) so that she can focus on tending for Cecil.

When Cecil graduated from college, their parents decided that it’s the right time to come back home. Now instead of being happy it, Rica was angry at their parents for returning and can’t accept that she has to share Cecil to anyone else. Then there’s the goofy Luis Manzano playing Cecil’s boyfriend. Rica can’t have one and Cecil shouldn’t have a love-life as well.

Hating Kapatid was tolerable and at times funny, especially when Vice Ganda delivers her one-liners but overall it lacked substance. It felt cheap with all the product placements throughout the movie. The producer must have made a killing with the product endorsements featured in the movie. I know that Hating Kapatid did well in the Philippine box office and it’s probably due to the large fan base of both stars.

The Philippine movie industry is dying and Hating Kapatid is a prime example of why it is in that state for the longest time. It had all the potentials. Maybe I enjoyed it more if it was done by a different director and with less product placements. If I’ve known from the start I’ll see a lot of endorsements in this movie then I should have turned on the TV and watched CFs instead.

From what I remember Sasha Baron Cohen is Bruno, a Gay Austrian fashion reporter who was sacked from his job. With his assistant’s assistant Lutz (Gustaf Hammarsten), he travels to the United States in his quest to be famous. He planned to do a celebrity interview show but this bombed out with the test audience. Actually I felt the same thing about this movie. I wonder how it scored with a test screening with unbiased viewers.

Now in an attempt to gain his superstardom, Bruno will assault us with shockingly dumb things one after another. He tried to make a sex tape with Ron Paul, reconcile Israel and Palestine, and adopts a African American baby. When these didn’t help him attain worldwide fame, he blamed it on his homosexuality and he tried to be heterosexual.

Brüno (Sasha Baron Cohen): So… if they are nice they are gay, right?

I don’t know what some people found funny in Bruno. It was all shock and no humor. I do enjoy stupid shows like Jackass but at least they poke fun on themselves and are unpretentious with what they do. Bruno resorted into making fun of others and it came out as offensive and annoying. Stereotypes were done in a disrespectful manner.

Bruno is easily one of the worst movies ever made. There’s no logical explanation to its existence. Maybe some people are turned on by Cohen’s strange humor but I don’t get it. Can you name another movie that’s worse than this one?